


Every Seven Years

by PhoenixFalls



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: (except by Fury), F/M, Multi, No fucks were given, Woke Up Married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-21
Updated: 2013-08-21
Packaged: 2017-12-24 06:10:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/936328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixFalls/pseuds/PhoenixFalls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony, Natasha, and Pepper notice two things when they wake up: they're naked, and they're wearing matching wedding bands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Every Seven Years

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rivulet027](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rivulet027/gifts).



“Huh.”

“Mmmf. . .?”

Tony tore his eyes away from his shiny new gold ring and turned over. Then he said “Huh” again. Natasha was not the person he had expected the warm body curled up behind him to be. There was a crease on her face from the pillow, and her eyes were screwed tight against the morning light streaming through the windows. When he didn’t respond to her muffled interrogative, she opened one eye cautiously.

A second red head appeared over Natasha’s shoulder. This time Tony said, “Oh, there you are.” He really needed to figure out something to say that wasn’t inane, but his brain didn’t seem to want to work just yet.

Pepper was squinting too, and finally Tony’s chivalrous instincts woke. “Hey JARVIS, draw the shades, would ya?”

Somehow JARVIS’s silence as he complied was judging.

This was the moment that Natasha apparently woke up completely, because she sprang to her feet, wide-eyed. And naked.

This time Pepper joined Tony in saying “Huh.”

They both peeked under the sheets at the same time to discover they were naked too.

Then JARVIS spoke. “Ms. Potts, Director Fury is on the phone asking to speak with you.” He still sounded judgy.

Natasha, bless her loyal little heart, said “Put him through” before either Tony or Pepper could respond. She grabbed one of the blankets from the foot of the bed and wrapped it around herself with impressive nonchalance.

JARVIS, cruel bastard that he was, put Fury up on the flatscreen so that they could see the vein popping out of his forehead.

Fury barely glanced at the scene in front of him, then lit into Pepper. “What the ever-loving fuck were you and your idiotic boytoy thinking, Potts?!?”

And that, that was just not on, not this early in the morning, and not when there was this much bare skin to admire. Tony cut Fury off with a “JARVIS, end call, and block Fury for at least the next two hours. Actually, block everybody for two hours, we’ll deal with them later, full communications blackout.”

Pepper’s dry “Thank you Tony” wove nicely together with JARVIS’s even drier “Of course sir.” But Natasha, who was not as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in the morning as Tony might have expected back in her Natalie Rushman days, had just noticed that she had acquired some new jewelry too. Her eyes were flicking from the gold band on her left ring finger to Tony’s and Pepper’s left hands, where their wedding bands (made out of vibranium, of course) had been joined by new gold bands that matched hers. She looked. . . not horrified.

Tony really did feel like this deserved another “Huh,” but he swallowed it. “You know, Natasha, I feel like Pep and I have been robbed a bit here. We’re not this easy. We never become bigamists without our prospective new spouse pulling out all the stops -- flowers, chocolates, skywritten proposals, constitutional amendments allowing polygamy. . .”

Natasha gave him an exaggerated eye roll, a hint of a smile turning up the corner of her mouth. “I don’t legally exist, Tony, so I’m pretty sure I can’t marry anyone.”

And then Pepper, lovely, glorious Pepper, proved again why Tony was a genius for giving her his company and taking her name. She pouted. “You’re worried about the wrong thing, Tony. It’s not upsetting that we missed out on the flowers. It’s upsetting that we missed out on the wedding night.”

Natasha grinned and let the blanket drop. “My humblest apologies, dear. I promise, I'll do anything necessary to make it up to you. . ."

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from episode 2x15 of _House,_ "Clueless." But that's pretty much irrelevant to the story. :)


End file.
